I am in a dilemma right now. I don’t want my world to come crumbling down on me just because I chose to cover up the one mistake I made which has also become my greatest source of joy.
I have been married for 10 years to the man who took my virginity. However, I have never been pregnant for him, not even once.
I visited different hospitals and doctors, went through countless test but they all certified me alright. The last doctor I consulted insisted I come along with my husband at my next appointment. When I told my husband about the doctor’s insistence on seeing him too, he refused at first but later agreed to go with me when he saw me crying profusely in the middle of the night.
The next morning, we headed to the hospital to see the doctor. And after a series of tests were conducted on me and my husband, the doctor certified both of us healthy to bear children. He, however, advised that we wait on God.
Eight years into our marriage, I traveled outside the country for a conference and on the night of the dinner, I think I drank a little too much and ended up in the bed of a colleague from another company. I felt irresponsible and guilty of this terrible mistake. I blamed myself for drinking too much when I knew I cannot handle myself when I drink. The worst part was that since we were both drunk, we didn’t use protection. “What if I had contacted any kind of infection?” I felt horrible!
About five weeks after my return, I started feeling unwell so I visited the hospital. After a few urine and blood tests, the doctor confirmed that I was three weeks pregnant. There were mixed feelings. I was excited and sad at the same time because I was so sure my husband wasn’t the father of my unborn child. Nevertheless, when I told him about the pregnancy, he was overjoyed. He shed tears of joy as he hugged and congratulated us on our soon-to-be-parents status.
He promised to take good care of me and also be a good father. Throughout the pregnancy, he was always by my side as we both looked forward to the birth of our child. When our son was finally born, my husband was the happiest man on earth. He shared in the early weeks of sleepless nights. He also helped out with changing diapers among other things so that I can get the much-needed rest as he also bonded with the baby.
But it has gotten to a stage where I can’t keep this secret anymore. I feel so guilty for unintentionally betraying my husband. But whenever I summon the courage to tell him the truth, his undiluted fatherly love for the boy stops me. He has brought so much joy into our family. Funny enough, the boy has the infant resemblance of my husband but I know deep down in my heart that the child is not his.
Our infant son is seven months old now and I’m beginning to see the resemblance with his biological father. Should I just tell my husband the truth and face the consequences or just keep quiet and enjoy my small family while I keep hoping and praying that my husband doesn’t discover the truth? What should I do? Please, I need advice.