Dear Angela,
I just found out my fiancé is already married! Why are some men so evil? I have asked myself this question severally but I just can’t find any answers. I met Melvin two years ago at a friend’s wedding. (Right now, I doubt if that’s even is real name too!) Well, we sat near each other on the same table at the wedding, so we got talking. We talked as if we had known each other for a long time for almost three hours we were at the wedding. Surprisingly, before I left the wedding, he took my phone number and promised to call me. True to his words, even before I got home, he called and we kicked it off almost immediately. I even left the guy I was dating when I saw Melvin’s level of seriousness and commitment to the relationship as I felt my boyfriend was merely wasting my time.
Melvin showered me lots of love, gifts, and money. He also made sure I and my family lacked absolutely nothing. While spending one of the weekends at his place, he popped the question with a few of his friends around, I felt on top of the world as I excitedly accepted Melvin’s proposal.
However, his secret was exposed when an old schoolmate of mine, Miriam saw us together at a shopping mall. As we hugged, she whispered into my ears, “Babe, who’s this man to you? You look really excited.” And with all smiles, I told her, “He’s my fiancé, the love of my life.” Then she said, “We cannot talk here. But there is something important I need to tell you.” I got worried but I also understand that with Melvin there with us, we cannot have our ‘girly talk’ as we wanted. So we exchanged phone numbers and I promised to call her that evening which I did. She told me she wanted us to see face-to-face and talk. We fixed an appointment and I visited her at home the next Saturday.
To my surprise, Miriam told me that Melvin is married to one of her family friends. I was shocked to my bone marrow. She added that he has been married for six years and his wife lives in Asaba with their two kids while he lives and works in Abuja. Of course, she noticed that I didn’t believe her so she called Melvin’s wife in my presence and put it on speaker. And it was confirmed that the woman at the other end was Melvin’s wife as she even said he came to visit them two weeks ago. I remembered he told me he was going out of Abuja for an official assignment so that I will not suspect him.
How come I didn’t know that my fiancé of more than a year has been married for six years with two kids and his wife is even pregnant with their third child? There is no single sign that he is married talk less of being married for six years. He kept his marriage and family well hidden. The truth is that I love him so much. And I am really heartbroken.
When I summoned the courage to ask him about his wife and kids, of course, he lied about it until I brought some proofs, thanks to my friend who sent their wedding photos as well as photos of him and his family to me.
That was when he opened up. However, he lied that they are about getting a divorce. But I knew deep down that he was lying through his teeth just to cover is deceitful act.
The truth, however, is that the woman who spoke with Miriam didn’t sound like a woman whose husband is about to leave or divorce. She sounded very excited. She kept thanking God for the husband and family God has blessed her with.
Since I didn’t want to break another woman’s happy home even though Melvin lied about divorcing his wife; I ended my relationship with him with so much difficulty. But then, I discovered a few weeks ago that I am pregnant. I really don’t know if I should tell him about my pregnancy or not?
What do I do? Please, I need advice!
Mary
Dear Mary,
Your story is touching. That is why it’s good to do some kind of background check as your relationship keeps progressing. However, my advice is that you should still inform him about your pregnancy since he is the father of your unborn baby. Your decision to inform him or not, however, solely depends on you and what you want for your life and baby. But, I will plead with you not to make a rash decision in a hurry though. I wish you all the best.
She sincerely needs your advice. So please read and leave your advice in the comment box below.
If you have any relationship issue bothering you or someone you know, please feel free to send a mail to [email protected].
