No doubt, every relationship has its ups and downs, but, when the downs outweigh the ups, it’s time to sit down and ponder if you still want to be in that relationship or quietly go your separate ways. But, again what if you walk away from this relationship and also find yourself in the same situation in your next relationship, will you also take a walk?
So, before you think of giving up on a relationship for any reason, here are 5 things to consider.
Ask Yourself What The Actual Problem Is
You should ask yourself what the root of the problem is. Ask yourself if the problem is a temporarily or permanent one. The important thing is that you have to know what you’re dealing with.
Is the problem temporary or bigger than you think? There are problems that can be easily worked on with conscious effort such as incessant quarrels, constant traveling for work, not being in the mood for sex, financial problems, career changes, arguments with extended family, health problems and so on.
But when the problem is not within your control, the problem might take a while to discover. However, when you do eventually find the roots of the matter, it would help you decide whether you can still work out things together or walk away from the relationship.
Honestly Talk To Each Other
Once you notice changes in your partner that you don’t like, honestly talk to the person about it. Don’t just assume anything. Challenges will not just disappear until you talk about them and if you ignore those issues that bother you, it may even cause ‘invisible’ distance between you and your partner that may eventually lead to a break up.
You must be really honest about your opinion of the problem, what and how you feel and how it’s negatively affecting your relationship. Also, allow your partner to express him/herself freely and honestly. Resist the urge to create false narratives of “he always” and “she never.” Avoid jumping to conclusions or assume you know exactly what he or she is thinking or about to say.
Remember why you fell in love in the first place
Before you decide to walk away from that relationship, remember why you feel in love with the person in the first place. Sometimes, the ‘spark’ in a relationship may go away but that doesn’t mean you cannot willingly work together to bring it back.
Real love requires attention, dedication and work to keep the spark alive in your relationship. So when you’re going through a tough time and think of giving up on your relationship, try to take your mind back to why you fell in love with him or her in the first place.
Listen to your instinct
Know that relationship is hard work. You have a choice to either stay back and work things out together with your partner or to walk away. However, listen to your instinct and make your choice.
Consult A Therapist
If you have tried everything possible in your relationship and there seems to be no head-way, then, you should consider seeing a therapist who will help your relationship navigate the rocky waters.
The therapist will utilize their professional skills and experience to function as an impartial listener. However, the therapist will not help you fix your problems; he or she will help identify patterns and habits contributing to the issues you’re passing through.
The therapist also has the right to counsel you as a couple or individually after listening to you both to help improve your relationship.